英语笑话高一 英语笑话长篇带翻译高中

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英语笑话高一 英语笑话长篇带翻译高中

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英语笑话高一 英语笑话长篇带翻译高中

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1、Once a simpleton’s wife told him to buy some ice.

Two hours later, he didn’t come back. She wanted to know why he didn’t come back and went out to have a look. She saw he was standing in the sun at the gate and watching the ice melting.

“What’s the matter?” She asked him. “Why don’t you bring it in?”

“I saw the ice was wet and I was afraid that you would scold me so I’m running it dry.” The simpleton answered.

从前有一个笨人的.妻子让她的丈夫买几块冰。

两个小时后,他还没回来。

她想知道他为什么没回来,就出去看了看,发现她的丈夫在门口站着,在太阳下晒冰,看着冰融化。

她问他:“怎么啦?你为什么不把它拿进来?”

“我看见冰是湿的,恐怕你会训斥我,因此,我正在把它晒干。”笨人回答道。

"Doing my christmas shopping early," replied the defendant.

"That's no offense," replied the judge, "How early were you doing this shopping?"

"Before the store opened," countered the prisoner.

那天是圣诞节,法官在审讯犯人时也有点恻隐之心。“你为什么而被起诉?”他问。

“采购圣诞节物品过早。”被告答。

“这不算犯法,”法官回答,“你购物多早?”

在商店开门之前,“犯人应道。

3、A judge asked our group of potential jurors whether anyone should be excused, and one man raised his hand."I can't hear out of my left ear," the man told the judge."Can you hear out of your right ear?" the judge asked. The man nodded his head.

"You'll be allowed to serve on the jury," the judge declared. "We only listen to one side of the case at a time."

一位法官问我们这群修补陪审员是否有人应当免权。一个人举起了手。“我的左耳听不见。”那人告诉法官。“你的右边耳朵听得见吗?”法官问道。那人点了点头。“你将被允许加入陪审团,”法官宣布。“我们每次只听一面之辞。”

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高中英语笑话带翻译大全?

英语笑话,幽默故事,如选择合理,运用得当,可以成为英语教师有力的教学工具和完美的附加教材,起到辅助教学的良好作用。本文是高中英语笑话带翻译,希望对大家有帮助!

高中英语笑话带翻译篇一

A precocious boy 早慧的小男孩

A little boy was wise beyond his age. One day he came home from the public library with a book. Its title was "The Care and Management of Children".

"Oh, my god," exclaimed his mother in astonishment. "What are you doing with a book like that?"

"Oh, " replied the precocious***早熟的*** boy, "I want to see if I'm being brought up properly."

一个早慧的小男孩有一天从公共图书馆回家时带回一本书,书名是《对儿童的照料和管理》。

他的母亲惊讶得大叫道:“啊,我的天哪!你要这样的书干什么呢?”

这个早慧的孩子回答说:“哦,我想看看我是否是在受到正确的教养。”

高中英语笑话带翻译篇二

What do I get? 我能得到什么?

Teacher: If I cut a beefsteak in half and then cut the half in half, what do I get?

Tommy: Quarters.

Teacher: And then if I cut it twice again?

Tommy: Hamburger.

老师:如果我把一块牛排切成两半的两半,我能得到几块儿?

汤米:四块。

老师:那我要是再切两次,我能得到什么呢?

汤米:汉堡。

高中英语笑话带翻译篇三

Micro-parents forum 微型家长座谈会

Son: "Dad, are you available on Friday afternoon?"

Dad: "What ah?"

Son: "The school want parents to have a mini-parents forum!"

Dad: "What is micro-parents forum?"

Son: "It's only a class teacher, you and I participate in!"

儿子:“爸爸,星期五下午您有空吗?”

爸爸:“什么事啊?”

儿子:“学校要开微型家长座谈会!”

爸爸:“什么叫微型家长座谈会?”

儿子:“就是只有班主任,你和我参加!”

高中英语笑话带翻译篇四

A garbage collector 垃圾收集工

John was ten years old, and he was a very lazy boy.

He had to go to school of course, but he was bored there and tried to do as little work as possible. His father and mother were both doctors and they hoped that he would bee one, too, when he grew up, but one day Lohn said to his mother, "When I finish school, I want to bee a garbage collector."

"A garbage collector?" his mother asked. She was very surprised. "That's not a very pleasant job. Why do you want to bee a garbage collector?"

"Because then I'd only have to work one day a week," Lohn answered.

"Only one day a week?" his mother said. "What do you mean?"

"Well," John answered, "I know that the ones who e to our house only work on Wednesday, because I only see them on that day."

约翰10岁了,是一个非常懒的男孩子。

当然他必须去上学,但他厌烦学校,并尽可能地少做功课。他父母亲两人都是医生,他们两人都希望当他长大后也当个医生,但有一天,约翰对他母亲说,“我上完学,我想当个垃圾收集工。”

“垃圾收集工?” 他母亲问道。他母亲非常吃惊。“那可不是一件令人愉快的工作。你为什么想当一个垃圾收集工呢?”

“因为到时候我只需一周工作一天,” 约翰回答说。

“一周只工作一天?” 他母亲说。“你是什么意思?”

“嗯,” 约翰回答说,“我知道来我们家的那些人只在星期三上班,因为我只在星期三看见他们。”

高中英语笑话带翻译篇五

The remaining sheep 剩下的羊

The teacher said: "If the shepherd put twenty sheep out to feed on the grass in a field, five of them jumped a fence, how many sheep would be left?"

"None," called out little Mac. The teacher said: "I am surprised that you can't count correctly. I know that you are good at arithmetic, but you have made such a mistake now."

Little Mac said: "You know arithmetic, teacher, but you don't know sheep. I know that if one sheep jumped, the rest will follow it to do the same."

老师说:“如果牧羊人把20只羊放到牧场上去吃草,有5只羊跳出了围栏,还会剩下多少只?”

小麦克大声回答说:“一只都没有。”老师说:“我很惊讶,你竟然不会算数。我知道你的算术很好的,现在竟会出错。”

小麦克说:“老师,你懂算术,但你不了解羊。英语小故事我知道,若是有一只羊跳了出去,其余的就会跟着她跳出去。”

较长的英语笑话带翻译精选

民间笑话故事像神话小说等民间文学一样,是广大劳动人民在长期的生产劳动和与自然界作斗争的过程中,以口头形式创作和传承的文学体裁。我精心收集了较长的英语笑话带翻译,供大家欣赏学习!

较长的英语笑话带翻译篇1

A man in a hot air balloon realized he was lost. He reduced altitude and spotted a woman below. He descended a bit more and shouted, "Excuse me, can you help? I promised a friend I would meet him an hourago, but I don't know where I am."

The woman below replied, "You are in a hot air balloon hovering approximately 30 feet above the ground. You are between 40 and 41 degrees north latitude and between 59 and 60 degrees west longitude."

"You must be an engineer," said the balloonist.

"I am," replied the woman. "How did you know?"

"Well," answered the balloonist, "everything you told me is technically correct, but I have no idea what to make of you, and the fact is I am still lost. Frankly, you've not been much help so far."

The woman below responded, "You must be in management."

"I am," replied the balloonist, "but how did you know?"

"Well," said the woman, "you don't know where you are or where you are going. You have risen to where you are, due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise which you have no idea how to keep, and you expect people beneath you to solve your problems. The fact is you are in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but now, somehow, it's my fault!"

一个男人在热气球上,发现自己迷失了方向。他下降高度,下方有一个妇女。他又下降了一点,大声呼喊,"打扰下,你能帮个忙吗,一个小时以前我答应了一个朋友要和他见面,但现在我不知道我身处何地。”

妇女在下面回答,“你在一个热气球里,大约离地面三十英尺。你在北纬40-41度之间,西经59-60度之间。”

“你必定是个工程设计师,”气球上的男人说。

“我是,”女人回答。“你是怎么知道的?”

“是这样,”气球上的男人说“你告诉我的事在技术上都是正确的,但是我无法理解你的看法,事实是我依旧迷失。坦白说,到目前为止你没帮上我多少。”

下面的妇女回应道,“你一定是在管理部门工作。”

“我是,”气球上的男人回答,“这你是怎么知道的?”

“是啊,”妇女说,“你总是不知道你在哪里,也不知道你要去哪里。你的上升,是由于大量的热气。你对别人许下的承诺,你不知道如何履行,而且你还期望在你下面的人会解决你的问题。事实就是在我们见面之前,我们都在完全相同的立场上,可现在,不知怎么地,却成了我的错了。”

较长的英语笑话带翻译篇2

Dick was seven years old,and his sister,Catherine,was five.One day their mother took them to their aunt's house to play while she went to the big city to buy some new clothes.

The children played for an hour,and then at half past four their aunt took Dick into the kitchen.She gave him a nice cake and a knife and said to him,"Now here's a knife,Dick.Cut this cake in half and give one of the pieces to your sister,but remember to do it like a gentleman."

"Like a gentleman?" Dick asked."How do gentlemen do it?"

"They always give the bigger piece to the other person." answered his aunt at once.

"Oh" said Dick.He thought about this for a few seconds.Then he took the cake to his sister and said to her,"Cut this cake in half,Catherine.".

迪克年龄七岁,他的妹妹凯瑟琳五岁.一天,妈妈把他们带到姨妈家去玩,自己就到大城市去买些新的衣服.

孩子们玩了个把小时,在四点半的时候,姨妈领着迪克走进了厨房.她交给迪克一块精美的蛋糕和一把刀子,并对他说:“喏,迪克,给你刀子,把这块蛋糕一切为二,给你妹妹一块.不过,你得记住要做得像一个绅士那样.”

迪克问:“像一个绅士?绅士怎样做呢?”

他姨妈马上回答说:“绅士总是把大的一块让给别人的.”

迪克说了一声“噢”.他对此想了一会,然后,他把蛋糕拿给妹妹,并对她说:“凯瑟琳,你来把这块蛋糕一切为二吧.”

较长的英语笑话带翻译篇3

I work for 7up"!

我可是在七喜公司工作呀

Four best friends met at the hospital since their wives were giving births to their babies.The nurse comes up to the first man and says,"Congratulations,you got twins." The man said "How strange,I'm the manager of Minnesota Twins." After awhile the nurse comes up to the second man and says,"Congratulations,you got triplets." Man was like "Hmmm,strange I worked as a director for the "3 musketeers." Finally,the nurse comes up to the third man and says

"Congratulations,you got twins x2." Man is happy and says,"Ironic,I work for the hotel "4 Seasons." All three of them are happy until they see their last buddy jumping all over the place,cursing God and banging his head on the wall.They asked him what's wrong and he answered,"What's wrong?I work for 7up"!

四个好朋友在医院里碰面了,他们的妻子正在生产.护士过来对第一个男人说:"恭喜,你得了双胞胎."男人说:"多奇怪呀,我是明尼苏达双子队的经理."过了一会儿,护士过来对第二个男人说:"恭喜,你得了三胞胎."男人很喜欢:"嗯,又巧了.我是3M公司的董事."最后,护士跑来对第三个男人说:"恭喜,你得了2对双胞胎."男人很开心地说:"真令人啼笑皆非,我为四季宾馆工作."他们三个都很高兴,但第四个伙伴急得像热锅上的蚂蚁,咒骂上帝并用头撞墙.他们问他有什么不对劲,他回答道:"什么不对劲?我可是在七喜公司工作呀!"

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