长篇搞笑笑话作文英语版 长篇搞笑笑话作文英语翻译
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几个超搞笑的英语小笑话
The Old Cat
An old woman had a cat. The cat was very old; she could not run quickly, and she could not bite, because she was so old. One day the old cat saw a mouse; she jumped and caught the mouse. But she could not bite it; so the mouse got out of her mouth and ran away, because the cat could not bite it.
Then the old woman became very angry because the cat had not killed the mouse. She began to hit the cat. The cat said, "Do not hit your old servant. I have worked for you for many years, and I would work for you still, but I am too old. Do not be unkind to the old, but remember what good work the old did when they were young."
【译文】
老猫
一位老妇有只猫，这只猫很老，它跑不快了，也咬不了东西，因为它年纪太大了。一天，老猫发现一只老鼠，它跳过去抓这只老鼠，然而，它咬不住这只老鼠。因此，老鼠从它的嘴边溜掉了，因为老猫咬不了它。
于是，老妇很生气，因为老猫没有把老鼠咬死。她开始打这只猫，猫说：“不要打你的老仆人，我已经为你服务了很多年，而且还愿意为你效劳，但是，我实在太老了，对年纪大的不要这么无情，要记住老年人在年青时所做过的有益的事情。”
A man was going to the house of some rich person. As he went along the road, he saw a box of good apples at the side of the road. He said, "I do not want to eat those apples; for the rich man will give me much food; he will give me very nice food to eat." Then he took the apples and threw them away into the dust.
He went on and came to a river. The river had become very big; so he could not go over it. He waited for some time; then he said, "I cannot go to the rich man's house today, for I cannot get over the river."
He began to go home. He had eaten no food that day. He began to want food. He came to the apples, and he was glad to take them out of the dust and eat them.
Do not throw good things away; you may be glad to have them at some other time.
【译文】
一个人正朝着一个富人的房子走去，当他沿着路走时，在路的一边他发现一箱好苹果，他说：“我不打算吃那些苹果，因为富人会给我更多的食物，他会给我很好吃的东西。”然后他拿起苹果，一把扔到土里去。
他继续走，来到河边，河涨水了，因此，他到不了河对岸，他等了一会儿，然后他说：“今天我去不了富人家了，因为我不能渡过河。”
他开始回家，那天他没有吃东西。他就开始去找吃的，他找到苹果，很高兴地把它们从尘土中翻出来吃了。
不要把好东西扔掉，换个时候你会觉得它们大有用处。
The City Mouse and the Country Mouse
Once there were two mice. They were friends. One mouse lived in the country; the other mouse lived in the city. After many years the Country mouse saw the City mouse; he said, "Do come and see me at my house in the country." So the City mouse went. The City mouse said, "This food is not good, and your house is not good. Why do you live in a hole in the field? You should come and live in the city. You would live in a nice house made of stone. You would have nice food to eat. You must come and see me at my house in the city."
The Country mouse went to the house of the City mouse. It was a very good house. Nice food was set ready for them to eat. But just as they began to eat they heard a great noise. The City mouse cried, " Run! Run! The cat is coming!" They ran away quickly and hid.
After some time they came out. When they came out, the Country mouse said, "I do not like living in the city. I like living in my hole in the field. For it is nicer to be poor and happy, than to be rich and afraid."
【译文】
城里老鼠和乡下老鼠
从前，有两只老鼠，它们是好朋友。一只老鼠居住在乡村，另一只住在城里。很多年以后，乡下老鼠碰到城里老鼠，它说：“你一定要来我乡下的家看看。”于是，城里老鼠就去了。乡下老鼠领着它到了一块田地上它自己的家里。它把所有最精美食物都找出来给城里老鼠。城里老鼠说：“这东西不好吃，你的家也不好，你为什么住在田野的地洞里呢？你应该搬到城里去住，你能住上用石头造的漂亮房子，还会吃上美味佳肴，你应该到我城里的家看看。”
乡下老鼠就到城里老鼠的家去。房子十分漂亮，好吃的东西也为他们摆好了。可是正当他们要开始吃的时候，听见很大的一阵响声，城里的老鼠叫喊起来：“快跑！快跑！猫来了！”他们飞快地跑开躲藏起来。
过了一会儿，他们出来了。当他们出来时，乡下老鼠说：“我不喜欢住在城里，我喜欢住在田野我的洞里。因为这样虽然贫穷但是快乐自在，比起虽然富有却要过着提心吊胆的生活来说，要好些。”
Teacher:Why are you late for school every morning?
Tom:Every time I come to the corner,a sign says,"School-Go slow".
老师:为什么你每天早晨都迟到?
汤姆:每当我经过学校的拐角处,就看见一个牌子上写着"学校----慢行".
A Good Boy
Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"
"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.
"You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?"
"She is the one who sells the candy."
好孩子
小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。
“昨天给你的钱干什么了？”
“我给了一个可怜的老太婆，”他回答说。 “你真是个好孩子，”妈妈骄傲地说。“再给你两分钱。可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢？”
“她是个卖糖果的。”
Drunk
One day, a father and his little son were going home. At this age, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now, he asked, "What's the meaning of the word 'Drunk', dad?" "Well, my son," his father replied, "look, there are standing two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk."
"But, dad," the boy said, " there's only ONE policeman!"
醉酒
一天，父亲与小儿子一道回家。这个孩子正处于那种对什么事都很感兴趣的年龄，老是有提不完的问题。他向父亲发问道：“爸爸，‘醉’字是什么意思？” “唔，孩子，”父亲回答说，“你瞧那儿站着两个警察。如果我把他们看成了四个，那么我就算醉了。” “可是，爸爸， ”孩子说，“那儿只有一个警察呀！”
A little bird fly to south for the winter. It was very cold, almost frozen bird. Hence, fly to a large space, after a cow there, in a pile of cow dung upon the bird, frozen bird lying on the dunghill, feel very warm, gradually recovered, it is warm and comfortable lying, and soon began to sing songs, a passing wildcat hear voices, see, follow the voice, wildcats quickly found lying on the dunghill, bird, pull it out.
The way of existence: not everyone to lead the dung upon your people are your enemy. Each of you is not from the dunghill lire people are your friends, and, when you lying on the dunghill, had better keep your mouth shut.
粪堆里的小鸟
一只小鸟飞到南方去过冬。天很冷，小鸟几乎冻僵了。于是，飞到一大块空地上，一头牛经过那儿，拉了一堆牛粪在小鸟的身上，冻僵的小鸟躺在粪堆里，觉得很温暖，渐渐苏醒过来，它温暖而舒服的躺着，不久唱起歌来，一只路过的野猫听到声音，走过去看个究竟，循着声音，野猫很快发现了躺在粪堆里的小鸟，把它拽出来吃掉了。
生存之道：不是每个往你身上拉大粪的人都是你的敌人。也不是每个把你从粪堆里拉出来的人都是你的朋友，还有，当你躺在粪堆里时，最好把你的嘴闭上。
One day, there was a blind man sitting on the steps of a building with a sign by his feet, that read: "I am blind, please help."
A creative publicist was walking by the blind man and stopped to observe that the man only had a few coins in his hat. He put a few of his own coins in the hat, and without stopping to ask for permission, took the sign, turned it around, and wrote a new message. He then placed the sign by the feet of the blind man, and left.
一天，有个瞎子坐在一栋大楼的台阶上，脚下的标牌上写着：“我是个瞎子，请帮帮我。”
一位有创意的广告员从瞎子身旁经过时停了下来，看到瞎子的帽子里只有一些硬币。他也在帽子里放了几个硬币，未经允许，就拿过标牌，翻过来在上面重新写了一句标语，然后把标牌放回瞎子的脚下，离开了。
那天下午晚些时候，这位广告员回到了这个身旁，他发现帽子里几乎装满了纸钞和硬币。瞎子听出了他的脚步声，问他是否是那个改标牌的人？他也想知道这位男士在上面写了什么。
广告员回答说：“我只是改了你的标语使人们能够看明白。”他向这个瞎子表达了祝福，说了再见，继续走自己的路。
瞎子并不知道，他的新标语是这样的：
现在是春天，但我却看不到。
幽默感的英语作文
在日复一日的学习、工作或生活中，大家都不可避免地会接触到作文吧，写作文是培养人们的观察力、联想力、想象力、思考力和记忆力的重要手段。那么，怎么去写作文呢？下面是我为大家收集的有关幽默感的英语作文「带翻译」，仅供参考，希望能够帮助到大家！
幽默感的英语作文 篇1
A sense of humor is universally considered the most valuable asset in our personality. It is born within every persons heart but it has to be cultivated.A person without a sense of humor is just like a spring without flowers or a dish without seasoning. In a sense your personality lies in your sense of humor.
Humor can enhance physical as well as mental well?being. It helps us bare our burdens reduce tension helps us overcome our frustrations relax our muscles and dissolve countless trifles and irritations offered by day?to?day life.
With the cracking of a joke all of our worries and sadness disappear like mist and we are full of vigor once again. Besides humor helps us live in harmony with others. With it you can always stay on good terms with others. ?
One way to cultivate a sense of humor is to have a wide range of knowledge about many topics so that the slightest differences in meaning of a joke can be fully understood; otherwise we would be simply at a loss in such a situation. Another crucial point in developing a sense of humor is to have a rich imagination. Nothing can be worse than the lack of imagination to kill an otherwise funny joke. ?
A sense of humor is one of the ways in which we relax and recreate ourselves. The things we find humorous may vary but to have a sense of humor is very important and should be cultivated to get the most out of life.
译文：
幽默感被公认为是人的性格中最有价值的私有财产。它是与生俱来的但也需要后天的培养。一个人如果没有幽默感就像春天没有花朵一盘菜没有调料。从某种意义来说你的个性来自于你的幽默感。？
幽默能够提高我们的身心素质。它能够帮助我们减轻压力、缓解紧张、笑对挫折、放松身体、化解日常生活中的琐事和愤怒它能化干戈为玉帛。随着一声玩笑所有的苦恼、悲伤和疲劳都会烟消云散让我们再次充满了生机和活力。此外幽默还有助于我们与他人和睦相处。有了它你就会时常与他人保持良好关系。
培养幽默感的一个途径是众多的话题都要有广博的`知识往往幽默是在细微之处见精神只有拥有广博的知识才能懂得幽默；否则我们在面对别人的幽默时就会不知所措。另外培养幽默感时同样关键的一点是要有丰富的想象力。缺乏想象力则会置幽默于死地。
幽默感是我们放松和娱乐的途径之一。 幽默可能因事而异但至关重要的是要有幽默感而且应该积极培养之以期生活更加丰富多彩。
幽默感的英语作文 篇2
Humor can reduce distress and unhappiness by creating a pleasant and friendly atmosphere. While stiff expressions make others uncomfortable smiles and wit can soften anger relieve depression and comfort a broken heart. Humor can foster better communication and understanding and therefore not only brings happiness to oneself but also and perhaps more importantly gratifies others. A sense of humor can certainly increase ones popularity. ?
Humor can clearly be of much help to our work study and life as it is beneficial to our physical and mental health. Not everyone one has an innate sense of humor however. A sense of humor is usually acquired in relation to others. In order to develop a sense of humor one must have an open mind and the ability to deal with unpleasant events and people. Humor also requires a broad spectrum of knowledge and optimistic thinking.
译文：
什么是幽默？它不是小丑企图取悦别人的表演也不仅仅是拿别人来寻开心。幽默是缓和尴尬局面的智慧和机智。生活中避免不了失望、挫折和失败如果我们承受挫折的忍耐力不够焦虑和恐慌就会主导我们的身心。但如果一个人有幽默感他就能用一种明智而健康的方式在心理上适应变化的环境。
幽默通过创造一种愉快而友好的气氛来减轻不幸和苦恼。僵硬的表达让别人不舒服微笑和机智却能熄灭怒火、减轻沮丧、抚慰绝望。幽默能促进更好的沟通和理解因而不仅把快乐带给自身而且更重要的还能让别人感到高兴。幽默感确实能提高一个人受欢迎的程度。
因为幽默有益于我们的身心健康所以对我们的生活、工作、学习无疑都大有帮助。但没有人是生来就有幽默感的。幽默感通常是在人际交往中形成的。为了培养幽默感一个人必须有开放的心胸和接受不愉快的事物的能力。幽默还需要有宽广的知识面和乐观的心态。
幽默感的英语作文 篇3
A sense of humorGods greatest gift to mankindis universally considered the most valuable personality.It is born within every persons heartbut has to be cultivated.A person without humor is just like a spring without flowersor like a dish without seasoning.In a senseyour personality lies in your sense of humor.
Humor can improve physical as well as mental well-being.It helps us bear our burdenslessen our tensionovercome our frustration.With a piece of jokeall our worries and sadness disappear like smokeand we are full of vigor once again.
Humor helps us live in harmony with others.It is unavoidable to have misunderstanding and tension with others during work and study.But humor can ease these problems quicker than angry words or quarrels.With it you can always keep on good terms with others.
A sense of humor is really one of the keys to happiness.It gives fun and zest to life to make it worth living.
幽默是上帝赐予人类的最好礼物，是公认的最有价值的人格。它存在于每个人的心中，但需要培养。一个人如果没有幽默感就像春天没有花朵，就像一道菜没有调料。在某种意义上，你的人格魅力就在于你的感觉幽默感。
幽默能改善身体和精神健康。它帮助我们承担我们的负担，减轻我们的紧张，克服我们的挫折。一个笑话，我们所有的忧虑和悲伤消失如烟，我们充满活力再次。
幽默有助于我们与他人和谐相处，在工作和学习中难免与别人产生误解和紧张，但幽默能比愤怒的言语或争吵更快地缓和这些问题，与之保持良好的关系。。
幽默感真的是幸福的一把钥匙，它给生活带来乐趣，让它活得有价值。
英语作文有关动物的笑话 160字 附有中文翻译
The owner of the hamburger stand was rather surprised to see a man walk in with three iguanas, but when the man ordered four thamburgers with fries, the owner complied with a shrug. The man and his iguanas enjoyed their dinner and left.
有个人牵了三只大蜥蜴走进一家汉堡店，老板吓了一跳。接着他点了四份汉堡和薯条，老板耸耸肩答应了他的要求，那个老兄和他的蜥蜴享受过晚餐后便离开了。
The next day the man returned with two kangaroos and the same scene was repeated.
第二天，那个人带了两只袋鼠，又点了相同的东西。
On the third day the man entered with two orangutans and a chimpanzee, and the owner could't help making a remark. " You certainly seem to be an animal lover," he said.
第三天，他带了两只红毛猩猩和一只黑猩猩。老板实在忍不住，便说：“您实在是个爱护动物的有心人。”
"That's true," said the man, "and I'd like you to know how much we appreciate your letting us eat here. Some proprietors object."
“那倒是真的，”那位仁兄回答说道。“另外我也要感谢你让我们进来吃晚餐，许多店老板都拒绝卖东西给我们。”
"That's quite alright," said the shopkeeper.
“没有问题啦！”店老板说。
"As a token of my appreciation, I'd like to give you this lobster." And the animal lover handed over a live, wriggling crustacean.
“为了向你表示谢意，我送你一只龙虾。”说着他便给老板一只活蹦乱跳的大龙虾。
"Well, that's very kind of you. My wife and I will have it for dinner."
“您真好，我太太和我将以它当晚餐。”
"Oh, he's already had dinner. But I'm sure he'd love to take in a movie."
“喔，它已经吃过晚餐了，但我想它会喜欢看场电影。”
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