美式笑话开头怎么说英语 美式笑话开头怎么说的
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关于短篇美式英语小笑话
冷笑话是近几年才出现的新兴语言现象，它以网络为主要的传播方式。我精心收集了关于短篇美式英语小笑话，供大家欣赏学习!
关于短篇美式英语小笑话篇1
For months I hinted that I needed a new wedding ring, since I had developed an allergy togold. On my birthday, while I was gardening, my husband asked me for gift suggestions. I heldmy hands up and said, "Well, you'll notice that my hands are bare." Later that evening I openedmy present with enthusiasm. "Happy birthday," he said, as I unwrapped a new pair ofgardening gloves.
几个月以来，我一直在向丈夫暗示我需要一枚新的结婚戒指，因为我对黄金有点过敏。生日那天，我正在干园艺活时，丈夫问我想要什么礼物。我举起双手说：“嗯，你肯定看到了，我的两手都是光光的。” 那天晚上，我满怀热情地拆开了丈夫送的礼物。“生日快乐!”他说。我打开一看：里面包着一双园艺手套。
关于短篇美式英语小笑话篇2
One day a ten-year-old child asked his mother, "Mom, what is a synonym?" "What? You evendon't know what a synonym is? How foolish you are. When I describe you as foolish, I meanyou're silly, stupid. Now you know what a synonym is ?" "Yes, a synonym is using badlanguage." The child concluded.
一天， 一个10岁的孩子问母亲："妈，什么是 同义词 ?" "你说什么?竟然连同义词都不懂!真是个笨蛋。我说你是个笨蛋，就是说你是个傻瓜，是个蠢货。你现在明白同义词的意思了吗?" "明白了。同义词就是骂人。"
关于短篇美式英语小笑话篇3
Mother asked her little boy, "Darling, what did the teacher teach you today?" "Nothing, Mum,"answered the son proundly, "instead, she asked me how much one plus two was, and I told herthree."
母亲问她年幼的儿子：“宝贝，今天老师教了你些什么?”
儿子骄傲地说：“什么都没教，妈妈。她反倒问我一加二等于几，我告诉她等于三。”
关于短篇美式英语小笑话篇4
A schoolboy went home with a pain in his stomach. "Well, sit down and eat your tea," said hismother. "Your stomach's hurting because it's empty. It'll be all right when you've got somethingin it." Shortly afterwards Dad come in from the office, complaining of a headache. "That'sbecause it's empty," said his bright son. "You'd be all right if you had something in it."
一个男孩放学回家时，觉得肚子痛。“来，坐下，吃点点心，”妈妈说，“你肚子痛是因为肚子是空的。吃点东西就会好的。” 一会儿，男孩的爸爸下班回家了，说是头痛。 “你头痛是因为你的脑袋是空的，”他那聪明的儿子说，“里面装点东西，就会好的。”
关于短篇美式英语小笑话篇5
One night a hotel caught fire， and the people who were staying in it ran out in their nightclothes.Two men stood outside and looked at the fire.“Before I came out,”said one，“I ran intosome of the rooms and found a lot of money.People don't think of money when they're afraid.When anyone leaves paper money in a fire，the fire burns it.So I took all the bills that I couldfind.No one will be poorer because I took them.” “You don't know my work，” said theother.“What is your work?”“I'm a policeman.“Oh!” cried the first man. He thought quicklyand said，“And do you know my work?”“No,”said the policeman.“I'm a writer. I'm alwaystelling stories about things that never happened.”
一天晚上，一家旅馆失火，住在这家旅馆里的人穿着睡 衣就跑了出来。两个人站在外面，看着大火。“在我出来之前，”其中一个说：“我跑进一些房间，找到了一大笔钱。人在恐惧中是不会想到钱的。如果有人把纸币留在火里，火就会把它烧成灰烬。所以我把我所能找到的钞票都拿走了。没有人会因为我拿走它们而变得更穷。”
“你不知道我是干什么的。”另一个说。“你是干什么的?” “我是警察。” “噢!”第一个人喊了一声。他灵机一动，说：“那你知道我是干什么的?”“不知道。”警察说。“我是个作家。我总是爱编一些从未发生过的 故事 。”
美国人说你是个笑话怎么说
美国人说你是个笑话是这样说的Youareajoke。根据查阅相关资料，汉语你是个笑话用美式英语进行翻译是Youareajoke。
美式幽默英语笑话
美式幽默英语笑话
假如我是一个经理
One day in class, the teacher assigned his students to write a composition – If I Am a Manager.All the students began to write except a boy. The teacher went to him and asked the reason.I am waiting for my secretary, was the boy’s answer.
一天课上，老师要同学们以如果我是一个经理为题写一篇作文。所有的学生都在动笔写了，只有一个男生例外。老师走过去问他为什么不写。我在等我的秘书。那孩子答道。
为什么不呼救
Policeman: Why didn't you shout for help when you were robbed of your watch? Man: If I had opened my mouth, they'd have found my four gold teeth. That would be much worse.
警察：有人抢你的手表时，你为什么不呼救呢?男子：要是我张口的话，他们就会发现我的四颗金牙，那就更糟了。
是我把他晾干
Jim and Mary were both patients in a Mental Hospital. One day while they were walking by the hospital swimming pool, Jim suddenly jumped into the deep end. He sank to the bottom. Mary promptly jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom and pulled Jim out.
When the medical director became aware of Mary's heroic act he immediately reviewed her file and called her into his office.
Mary replied, "He didn't hang himself, I hung him up to dry."
Jim和Mary都是精神病院里的病人。一天，他们沿着医院的游泳池散步，Jim突然跳入泳池的深水区，他沉到了底部。Mary立刻跳下去救他，她潜到水底，把Jim拉了上来。
当院长听闻了Mary的英勇行为后，他立刻翻看了她的`病历档案,把她叫进了自己的办公室.
“Mary，我有一个好消息和一个坏消息要告诉你。好消息是你能跳入水中救其他病人，这说明你的意识已经恢复了，你可以出院了。坏消息就是，Jim，你救的那个病人，他还是用自己的浴袍带子在浴室上吊自杀了。”
Mary说：“他没有自杀，是我把他吊起来好让他晾干。”
没想到那么贵
A shoplifter 51kxh.cn |was caught red-handed trying to steal a watch from a jewelry store. "Listen," said the shoplifter, "I know you don't want any trouble either. What do you say I just buy the watch, and we forget about this?" The manager agreed and wrote up the sales slip. The crook looked at the slip and said, "This is a little more than I intended to spend."
一个小偷在一家珠宝店企图偷走一只手表的时候被当场擒获。“听着，”小偷说，“我知道你们也不想惹麻烦。我把这只表买下，然后我们就当什么也没发生，你看怎样?”经理表示同意，然后列了一张售货单。小偷看着单子说道：“这比我最初的预算稍稍高了一点，你们还有没有便宜一点儿东西。”
死后重生
"Do you believe in life after death?" the boss asked one of his employees.
"Yes, Sir." the new recruit replied.
"Well, then, that makes everything just fine," the boss went on. "After you left early yesterday to go to your grandmother's funeral, she stopped in to see you."
“你相信人死后仍有生命吗?”老板问他的一个员工。
“是的，先生。”这个新员工回答说。
“哦，那么，这样说来一切就很正常了，”老板继续说，“在你今早离开，去参加你奶奶的葬礼，她来看你了。”
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