吸引男生的幽默笑话英文版 吸引男生的幽默笑话英文翻译
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英语幽默笑话带翻译30个单词
He Won
Tommy: How is your little brother, Johnny? Johnny: He is ill in bed. He hurt himself.
Tommy: That's too bad. How did that happen?
Johnny: We played who could lean furthest out of the window, and he won.
他赢了
汤姆:约翰尼,你小弟弟好吗?
约翰尼:他害病卧床了。他受了伤。
汤姆:真糟糕,怎么回事儿?
约翰尼:我们做游戏,看谁能把身子探出窗外最远,他赢了。
I Have His Ear in My Pocket
Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked, "What happened?"
"A kid bit me," replied Ivan.
"Would you recognize him if you saw him again?" asked his mother.
"I'd know him any where," said Ivan. "I have his ear in my pocket."
他的耳朵在我衣兜里
伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里。他妈妈问,“发生了什么事?”
“一个男孩咬了我一口,”伊凡说。
“再见到他你能认出来吗?”妈妈问。
“他走到哪里我都能认出他,”伊凡说。“他的耳朵还在我衣兜里呢。”
A Good Boy
Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"
"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.
"You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?"
"She is the one who sells the candy."
好孩子
小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。
“昨天给你的钱干什么了?”
“我给了一个可怜的老太婆,”他回答说。 “你真是个好孩子,”妈妈骄傲地说。“再给你两分钱。可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢?”
“她是个卖糖果的。”
Drunk
One day, a father and his little son were going home. At this age, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now, he asked, "What's the meaning of the word 'Drunk', dad?" "Well, my son," his father replied, "look, there are standing two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk."
"But, dad," the boy said, " there's only ONE policeman!"
醉酒
一天,父亲与小儿子一道回家。这个孩子正处于那种对什么事都很感兴趣的年龄,老是有提不完的问题。他向父亲发问道:“爸爸,‘醉’字是什么意思?” “唔,孩子,”父亲回答说,“你瞧那儿站着两个警察。如果我把他们看成了四个,那么我就算醉了。” “可是,爸爸, ”孩子说,“那儿只有一个警察呀!”
Hospitality
The hostess apologized to her unexpected guest for serving an apple-pie without any cheese. The little boy of the family left the room quietly for a moment and returned with a piece of cheese which he laid on the guest's plate. The visitor smiled, put the cheese into his mouth and then said: "You must have better eyes than your mother, sonny. Where did you find the cheese?" "In the rat-trap, sir," replied the boy.
好客
由于客人在吃苹果馅饼时,家里没有奶酪了,于是女主人向大家表示歉意。这家的小男孩悄悄地离开了屋子。过了一会儿,他拿着一片奶酪回到房间,把奶酪放在客人的盘子里。 客人微笑着把奶酪放进嘴里说:“孩子,你的眼睛就是比你妈妈的好。你在哪里找到的奶酪?” “在捕鼠夹上,先生。”那小男孩说。
英语小笑话
上个星期五我穿了一件 Adidas 的衣服去打球, 一个老美看到就笑我说, "Do you
know what does it mean? It means All Day I Dream About Sex.我整天都在想著
性, 缩写正好是 Adidas) " 我正惊讶他怎么反应这么快, 联想力这么丰富时,旁边的
一个老美帮我解围, 他说, 有一个很著名的合唱团 Korn, 他们的招牌歌之一就是
A.D.I.D.A.S, (All day I dream about sex)所以呢,这个典故可是很多老美都耳熟
能详的喔! 下次就换你去取笑老美了.
英文幽默笑话带翻译短篇?
笑话 在《现代汉语词典》中作名词解时意为 能引人发笑的谈话或故事,供人当作笑料的事情 ,是一种以民间口头创作为主的文学样式。下面是我带来的英文短篇幽默笑话带翻译,欢迎阅读!
英文短篇幽默笑话带翻译篇一
The newlyweds entered the elevator of their Miami Beach hotel. The operator, a magnificent blonde, looked at them in surprise and said, "Why, hello, Teddy, how are you?" When the couple reached their room, the piqued bride demanded: "Who was that woman?!" "Take it easy, honey," said the groom, "I'm going to have trouble enough explaining you to her."
一对新婚夫妇走进位于迈阿密海滩旅馆的电梯。电梯操作员是一个漂亮的金发碧眼的美女,看到他们十分惊奇,她说:“嗨,Teddy,你好吗?”夫妇俩到了他们自己的房间,愤怒的新娘要求丈夫做出解释:“那女人是谁?!”“冷静点,宝贝,”新郎说: “我得对她解释你是谁,这已经足够烦死我了。”
英文短篇幽默笑话带翻译篇二
Three men were sitting on a park bench. The one in the middle was reading a newspaper; the others were pretending to fish. They baited imaginary hooks, cast lines and reeled in their catch.
三位男子在公园的长椅土坐着。中间的一个在读报纸,另外两个在假装钓鱼。他们给想象的鱼钩上鱼饵,放线,并卷线把鱼抓上来。
A passing policeman stopped to watch the spectacle and asked the man in the middle if he knew the other two.
一位过路警察驻足观察了这个景象,他问中间的那个男子是否认识其他两位。
"Oh yes," he said. "They are my friends”
“喔,认识,”他说,“他们是我的朋友”
"In that case," warned the officer, "you'd better get them out of here!"
“那样的话,”警察告诫说,“你最好把他们从这里弄走。”
"Yes, sir." the man replied, and he began rowing furiously.
“好的,瞥官。”那男子回答说,接着就开始疯狂地做起划桨的动作来。
英文短篇幽默笑话带翻译篇三
Tom is a very old man. After dinner, he likes walking in the street. And he goes to bed at seven o’clock.
汤姆是一位老人,他喜欢在晚饭后到大街上散步,在7点回来睡觉。
But tonight, a car stopped at his house. A policeman helps him get out. He tells Tom’s wife, “The old man couldn’t find his way in the street. He asked me to take him in the car.”
但是,今天晚上一辆小汽车停在他家门前,汤姆在一位警察的帮助下走下汽车。警察告诉汤姆的妻子:“这位老人在街上迷路了,他让我用汽车送他回来。”
After the policeman leaves there, his wife asks, “Tom, you go to the street every night. But tonight you can’t find the way, what’s the matter?”
警察走后:“汤姆,你每天都到那条街上散步,但是今天你迷路了,你怎么了?”
The old man *** iles like a child and says, “I couldn’t find my way? I didn’t want to walk home.”
这位老人像孩子般的笑道:“我迷路了?我是不想走路回家。”
英文短篇幽默笑话带翻译篇四
One day a little girl came home from school, and said to her mother, "Mommy, today in school I was punished for something that I didn't do."
一天,小女孩从学校回到家里,对妈妈说:妈妈,今天在学校里我因为一件我没有做的事情而受到惩罚。
The mother exclaimed, "But that's terrible! I'm going to have a talk with your teacher about this! By the way, what was it that you didn't do?"
妈妈激动地说:那真是太可怕了!我要跟你的老师好好谈一谈,对了,你没有做过的那件事是什么?
The little girl replied, "My homework."
小女孩回答说:我的家庭作业。
英文短篇幽默笑话带翻译篇五
Teacher: What is the plural of man,Tom?老师: 汤姆,“男人”这个词的复数形式是什么?Tom: Men.汤姆:男人们。Teacher: Good. And the plural of child?
老师: 答得好。那“孩子”的复数形式呢?Tom : Twins.
汤姆: 双胞胎。
英语幽默笑话带翻译200字
英语幽默笑话带翻译
1:A man was hit by a cab in the street. He was brought to thehospital. His wife who was standing up by his bed, said to the doctor: "Ithink that he is very ill." "I am afraid that he is dead."saidthe doctor,
Hearing this, theman moved his head and said: "I'm not dead. I'm still alive.""Be quiet, "said the wife. "the doctor knows better thanyou!"
医生懂得多
一个男人在街上被出租车撞倒送进了医院.他的妻子站在他的床前对医生说:"我想他伤得很厉害."医生说:"我怕他已经死了."听到医生的话,这个男人转动着头说:"我没死,我还活着."妻子说:"安静,医生比你懂得多."
2:You can't go without me
The bus is verycrowded.Aman tries to get on,but no one gives way to him.
"Hey,let me get on the bus."the man shouts.
"It's too crowded.You'd better take the next bus."a passenger says tohim.
"But you can't go withou me.I'm the driver."the man says.
没有我你们走不了
公共汽车上很拥挤.一位男士想上车,但是没有人给他让路.
"喂,让我上车!"那位男士喊道.
"车太挤了,你最好坐下一辆"车上的一位乘客对他说.
"但是没有我你们走不了.我是司机!"那位男士说道.
3:Drunk
One day, a father and his little son were going home. At thisage, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always askingquestions. Now, he asked, "What's the meaning of the word 'Drunk',dad?" "Well, my son," his father replied, "look, there arestanding two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I amdrunk."
"But,dad," the boy said, " there's only ONE policeman!"
醉酒
一天,父亲与小儿子一道回家。这个孩子正处于那种对什么事都很感兴趣的年龄,老是有提不完的问题。他向父亲发问道:“爸爸,‘醉’字是什么意思?” “唔,孩子,”父亲回答说,“你瞧那儿站着两个警察。如果我把他们看成了四个,那么我就算醉了。” “可是,爸爸, ”孩子说,“那儿只有一个警察呀!”
4:Hospitality
The hostessapologized to her unexpected guest for serving an apple-pie without any cheese.The little boy of the family left the room quietly for a moment and returnedwith a piece of cheese which he laid on the guest's plate. The visitor smiled,put the cheese into his mouth and then said: "You must have better eyesthan your mother, sonny. Where did you find the cheese?" "In therat-trap, sir," replied the boy.
好客
由于客人在吃苹果馅饼时,家里没有奶酪了,于是女主人向大家表示歉意。这家的小男孩悄悄地离开了屋子。过了一会儿,他拿着一片奶酪回到房间,把奶酪放在客人的盘子里。客人微笑着把奶酪放进嘴里说:“孩子,你的眼睛就是比你妈妈的好。你在哪里找到的奶酪?” “在捕鼠夹上,先生。”那小男孩说。
5:Dear white, something you got to know .When I was born, I wasblack.When I grow up, I am blackWhen I'm under the sun, I'm blackWhen I'm cold,I'm blackWhen I'm afraid, I'm black.
When I'm sick, I'mblack.When I die, I'm still black.you---white people,When you were born, youwere pink.When you grow up, you become white.You're red under the sun.You'reblue when you're cold.You are yellow when you're afraid.You're green whenyou're sick.You're gray when you die.And you, call me "color"?
亲爱的白种人,有几件事你必须知道。当我出生时,我是黑色的我长大了,我是黑色的我在阳光下,我是黑色的我寒冷时,我是黑色的我害怕时,我是黑色的我生病了,我是黑色的当我死了,我仍是黑色的。你---白种人,当你出生时,你是粉红色的。你长大了,变成白色的。你在阳光下,你是红色的。你寒冷时,你是青色的。你害怕时,你是黄色的。你生病时,你是绿色的。当你死时,你是灰色的。而你,却叫我「有色人种」?
6:Where is the father?
Two brothers werelooking at some beautiful paintings.
"Look,"said the elder brother. "How nice these paintings are!"
"Yes,"said the younger, "but in all these paintings there is only the mother andthe children. Where is the father?"
The elder brotherthought for a moment and then explained, "Obviously he was painting thepictures."
兄弟俩在看一些漂亮的油画。
“看,”哥哥说,“这些画多漂亮呀!”
“是啊,”弟弟说道,“可是在所有这些画中,只有妈妈和孩子。
那爸爸去哪儿了呢?”
哥哥想了会儿,然后解释道:“很明显,他当时正在画这些画呗。”
7:How Many Rabbits?
Teacher: Now, Jonathan, if I gave you three rabbits and then the next day I gave youfive rabbits, how many rabbits would you have?
Jonathan: Nine, sir.
Teacher: Nine?
Jonathan: I've got one already, sir.
多少只兔子?
老师:好,乔纳森,假如我给你三只兔子,第二天我又给你五只,你一共有多少只兔子?
乔纳森:一共有九只,先生。
老师:九只?
乔纳森:先生,我本来就有一只。
8:These Are My Jeans
After going on adiet,a woman felt really good aboutherself----especially when she was able to fit into a pair of jeans she hadoutgrown long ago.
“Look,look.” she shouted while running downstairs to show her husband.“I can wear my old jeans again.”
Her husband lookedat her for a long time,when said,“Honey,I love you,butthese are my jeans.”
那是我的裤子!
一个妇女在减肥一段时间后自我感觉特别好——特别是当她又能穿上很早以前就穿不上的牛仔裤时。她跑下楼冲她丈夫喊道:“快看,快看。我又能穿上以前的裤子了。”她丈夫看了她好一会儿,然后说:“亲爱的,我爱你。但那是我的裤子。”
9:Themean man's party
The notoriouscheap skate finally decided to have a party. Explaining to a friend how to findhis apartment, he said, "Come up to 5M and ring the doorbell with yourelbow. When the door open, push with your foot."
"Why use myelbow and foot?"
"Well,gosh," was the reply, "You're not coming empty-hangded, areyou?"
吝啬鬼请客
一个出了名的吝啬鬼终于决定要请一次客了。他在向一个朋友解释怎么找到他家时说:“你上到五楼,找中间那个门,然后用你的胳膊肘按门铃。门开了之后,再用你的脚把门推开。”
“为什么要用我的肘和脚呢?”
“你的双手得拿礼物啊。天哪,你总不会空着手来吧?”吝啬鬼回答。
10:AllI do is pay
"My family isjust like a nation," Mr. Brown told his colleague. "My wife is theminister of finance, my mother-in-law is the minister of war, and my daughteris foreign secretary."
"Soundsinteresting, " his colleague replied. "And what is yourposition?"
"I'm thepeople. All I do is pay."
我要做的一切就是付钱
布朗先生告诉同事说:“我的家简直就象一个国家一样。我妻子
是财政部长。我岳母是作战部长,我女儿是外交秘书。”
“听上去挺有意思的,”他的同事说,“那你的职务是什么呢?”
“我就是老百姓。我要做的一切就是付钱。”
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